Daniel1784's WORST Hit songs of 2022 (Bottom 17)
Welcome! to my worst hit songs of 2022. The bottom 17. Oh, you all will have so much fun making fun of my hopefully not tasteless flop music taste. I really wonder what y'all think will be on this list. any guesses? anyone? no? ok... Anyways, I generally can tolerate most songs, even the ones that are just "ehhhhh" but there's always the good amount of songs that are just absolute torture to listen to. This year was really weird in a lot of ways, which i will get into later. Let's see what qualifies, first, shall we?
- Debut on the Hits 1 Weekend Countdown sometime between January 1st, 2023, and November 18th, 2023.
- Debut on my personal radio chart (Daniel's Mainstream Top 30) sometime between February 4th, 2023, and November 18th, 2023
Alright, now that that's out of the way, let's see what all our dishonour*able mentions are. These first seven songs are songs that definitely could have made the worst 17 if they met the criteria listed above.
Dishonorable Mention #1: Havanna Winter - death wish
So Hits 1 has this thing where they obsessively pick up every song from these random artists that next to no one care about. Havanna Winter is one of them, some edgy 16 year old teen that only seems to be copying other mid artists. "Rain Rain Go Away", her debut single, sounds like a direct copy of Nessa Barrett & Jaden Hossler's "la di die" and la di die wasn't even good, let alone good at all to deserve a direct copy. She then went on to copy the D'Amelio's in various songs, and even this "death wish" song, seems like it is copying the D'Amelio's in some aspects. On to Death Wish itself, it has edgy lyrics, a generic and ubiquitous 4-chord guitar that you could find in basically any song, and minimal production on top of that. You can honestly tell this song was either rushed or low budget, and that's not a good thing. The lyrics are also so basic.
it didn't have to be this way, but now that it is this way, I definitely won't be on the lookout for more music from Havanna Winter. No thanks for making me aware of her!
Dishonorable Mention #2: Chris Brown - Summer Too Hot
Chris Brown sure has a history, doesn't he? He's desperately trying to make a comeback with this wannabe summer anthem. And just like most summer anthem, I really don't like it. It's beat is so generic, and slightly irritating at times. Chris Brown's singing is alright, but the lyrics are so awful. Like seriously, can you sing about something else for once?
Dishonorable Mention #3: Labrinth feat. Billie Eilish - Never Felt So Alone
So if this was "Weirdest Songs of 2023" this would be top 5 at the very least. It's weird, It's bad, but it's not quite awful. Billie sounds genuinely better than she does in 93% of her songs, and Labrinth doesn't sound terrible, even if he still sounds pretty bad. What really makes me hate this is the annoying bell-sounds and the production all around. Like, seriously, this would have sounded good possibly if you just did a ballad or something, icl.
Dishonorable Mention #4: Coi Leray feat. David Guetta - Make My Day
The only thing that made my day when hearing this song was letting it immediately qualify for being a dishonorable mention.
In all seriousness, David Guetta has recently gotten a nickname of "The Recycling Bin" because of the only thing it seems he can do nowadays is sample popular 80s and 90s edm songs. And Coi Leray, another big fan of recycling older classics, decided it would be a bright idea to combine powers with the original and creative David Guetta to see how many original ideas there are in a song literally called "Make My Day". Guess how many there were. 0. ZERO. Z-E-R-O. Yeah, this song sucks, and it's not hard to see why.
Dishonorable Mention #5: Jason Derulo feat. Meghan Trainor - Hands On Me
BUM! BUM! BA DA DUM! DUM! DA DA DUM! DUM! BA DUM! DUM! BA DA DUM! DUM! DA DA DUM! DUM! she was she was she was she was the girl next door, that's my fine ass neighbor, if she wants some sugar-
yeah, that's enough sex music that samples a Ben E. King classic for now. And no, we never needed a song to sample one of the greatest songs of all time. So, no surprise, when Jason Derulo & Meghan Trainor sample it, it's definitely gonna be ass. NEXT!
Dishonorable Mention #6: Pitbull feat. Nile Rodgers - Freak 54 (Freak Out)
Pitbull went from being the party-starter to just keeping the party going for 15 years, and that's not a good thing whatsoever. This stupid song that's yet again about sex (*sigh*) also samples (*sigh*) a classic. and Nile Rodgers really doesn't help, especially since i can't even tell him apart from Pitbull's yelling and screaming about getting nasty and wild. The only good thing about this song is it's short. Good, I don't want to hear any more than i already have to.
Pitbull should go back to collabing with Chris Brown or something, because at least International Love was actually good.
Dishonorable Mention #7: Chris Brown - Under The Influence
This DHM is a little different; It is technically eligible, but it just doesn't quite make the cut of being absolutely terrible to listen to. That given, It's still pretty bad, because it's Chris Brown lol.
Alright, now that that's out of the way, we can finally see what my bottom 17 are.
#17. Sam Smith feat. Koffee & Jessie Reyez - Gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme what I want, what I want
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Gimme, gimme what I want, what I want
- Except from Sam Smith's 2023 song "Gimme"
Yeah, creative, right? To be fair, this song isn't *terrible*. Sam Smith and Koffee sound alright and the verses aren't terrible. But the chorus is what makes the song so goddamn annoying. I'm so glad this wasn't a big hit. I can't even imagine if it was. Good thing they didn't give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em give em what they want, what they want, oh
- side note: the song "Gimme" contains the word "Gimme" 112 times. Hey, at least it's an innocent word, not the N word like our next song.
#16. iCandy - Keep Dat
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Yeah, I'm not gonna say the actual N word on my blog, but i will let you know that iCandy "sings" the N word almost 70 times, and unlike Gimme, the verses aren't alright. Since the N-word is throughout the entire goddamn song. It's one thing if it's heard once, but i don't need to hear it 70 times in a 2 minute song. The beat to this song is also your generic club beat that sounds like it's sampled (thank god it's not). So yeah, I really did not need to know this song existed, Hits 1 and Daly Download really screwed up for adding this when it wasn't a big hit.
This next song is one i sure had enough of.
#15. Charlieonnafriday - Enough
No, Waffle, Charlieonnafriday has two n's in the name, not one. And the fact people should need to know that just because some guy from seattle decided to be "sewpuwr kewul and ewniquwey" and spell his name right. Hmm, sounds familiar, doesn't it?
This song is just a Post Malone copy. And even if Post Malone is good, that doesn't make it a good song. Not at all. His vocals are so drowned out in autotune just to make it sound remotely similar to Post Malone, and the production, just like in songs i've mentioned before, has next to nothing going on. Like, Why??
And while we're on the Charlieonnafriday topic...
#EX. Charlieonnafriday - I'm Not Crazy
So, If you're gonna sample a famous 2002 Matchbox Twenty song "Unwell" that was already mid to begin with, you can improve it, right? I mean, that's happened before with artists actually improving on older annoying songs (Notably Ava Max with Not Your Barbie Girl) but that rule only applies if you're an artist that's not already trying to copy people in your sound style alone. So, let's dive into the lyrics together, shall we?
First up is your drowned out keyboard-piano introduction which that alone already sounds like the song is bad; and it is, don't get me wrong. The first lyric just has to be "I'm not crazy, I'm just a little fucked up" "I know, It's always too late" "I still call you knowing you won't pick up" yeah, no. The drowned out autotune does it for me. I literally can't take this shit any longer. Please turn it off.
Daniel1784's Personal Assisstant: "No, We need you to listen to the whole thing for the review!"
Daniel1784's Personal Assisstant: "No, We need you to listen to the whole thing for the review!"
No, I won't, I've already listened like 25 times and i know it's absolutely awful. Please put me out of my misery. Thank you.
And what's surprising the most is that Charlieonnafriday actually has decent enough songs, notably Same Friends with Lil TJay. But, this obviously isn't it. NEXT.
